Wow, the universe has really been testing me lately, persistent in making sure that I go solo and ride the waves of instability – all the while standing on my own two left feet, juggling all kinds of shit. I’m no longer complaining. I know that with every hardship comes a valuable lesson. It’s true that self discovery and self love is a journey, with no destination; I may as well as enjoy it.
This is great. My break is still ongoing with still so many more days (actually weeks!) left and I almost feel like I’m getting a chance to reconnect with myself again.Anyways, it has been something I’ve been thinking about since I’ve noticed that when my energy is drained, I become the most socially awkward person ever. Which also means it takes a ton of energy for me to be social. Of course I am when I have to be but it ultimately just makes me tired. To be honest, I think I’m actually pretty good at it.
So during this break I’m quite happy by myself or at least when I feel that I am creating something. I hate that a lot of times I don’t have a chance to create because I’m working or too tired to do anything because of work. Writing, eating well, and working out mean a lot to me.
The most difficult moment is to wake up and get off the bed. These days the bed seems to stick like glue and my body doesn’t want to leave it at all. It feels like a successful day the minute I get off from the bed!
This morning I woke up trying to decide what I would do. Naturally, as a work-obsessed woman, I did feel the pressure to start working right away.
It’s funny because I thought I would be doing less after having a baby, but I feel like I’ve been able to accomplish more since having Chiara. You are forced to prioritize once you have a baby, which allows you to think more clearly about what is actually necessary and what is not.
It really puts things into perspective. You realize that half the things you were previously doing were unnecessary anyway. Now I have a set schedule. I feel like because I say no to the majority of events and opportunities that I used to say yes to, it allows bigger and better things to come my way.