Sense of being FREE

 What does “Being and feeling FREE mean ? “…I’ve been have having this question, unanswered for a very long time. In day to day life, we see and meet new people who perfectly finish their given task, as well as have time for fun, even in between those pressure filled situations.

Does that mean people who handle stressful situation well are all ‘feeling free’ all the time ?

In the game of running behind success and getting hold of recognition, people seem to be happy and enjoy their every moment in life. Then, does that mean they are all feeling “free” by doing whatever they wish and whatever pleases them ? Continue reading

Making Conscious Choices

Some days I am in a good place, some days I am not. Today is one of those days I am not.

I haven’t had a lot of good days lately, sigh, I am so tired. I don’t believe I am not a fun person, I try not to get attached easily and definitely not impulsive, so that’s why I keep asking myself how I got here. I have always been saving myself from experiencing the things I feel right now, I am so upset and it makes me angry that I am.

Image from here

So why do I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders, I find it hard to cry, tears won’t come, I am so tired. This is the part where I go numb and say fuck it. I probably don’t make sense to you right now, that’s the point. Continue reading

Another Life Update

Wow, the universe has really been testing me lately, persistent in making sure that I go solo and ride the waves of instability – all the while standing on my own two left feet, juggling all kinds of shit. I’m no longer complaining. I know that with every hardship comes a valuable lesson. It’s true that self discovery and self love is a journey, with no destination; I may as well as enjoy it.

This is great. My break is still ongoing with still so many more days (actually weeks!) left and I almost feel like I’m getting a chance to reconnect with myself again. Continue reading

Hope, In Times of Darkness

Some time ago, I had gone through something that nearly pushed me over the edge. It was something that I never expected, nor had any idea how to deal with. Someone very close to my heart made some bad decisions and threw her own life into a chaotic whirlpool, at the same time turning my life upside down.

This post is not about that person or the events that took place but rather the effect it had on me and my own life.

I had never in my life been so depressed. Not many people knew, just family and very close friends. I couldn’t talk about it without crying. I couldn’t go anywhere without crying. I couldn’t think straight. I couldn’t focus. I wasn’t able to sleep. I couldn’t eat. I was in a daze. Continue reading

Writer’s Block is Frustrating

Hello Everyone,

It’s been about a week since my last post. I’ve been wanting to write something, but every time I sit down at the computer I can’t think of anything. I keep writing a sentence or two and then deleting it. Even now, I’m finding it hard to figure out exactly where this post is going.

I’ve never been very good at handling writer’s block. I always sit there for a good while, before giving up and going off to do something else. That is actually one of the things I love about having this blog. It forces (in a way) me to write. I feel an obligation to write at least once a week (and yes I am aware that doesn’t always happen, but life can be busy). I believe that this expectation I’ve put on myself has helped me learn how to get past writer’s block. Continue reading